I met my brother in Christ, Jonathan, through Facebook. His testimony really touched my heart and I asked his permission to share his story… A decision was made not to edit the story, but to present it to you in its original composition. May it speak to your heart as well. Our God is an awesome God! Thank you, Jesus!
“I have recently returned to God, and am unsure of when it was that I truly gave my life to God and was born again, though I know that I am now. My Dad is a pastor, and wise man of God, who is strong in the Lord. My parents dedication to God and adherence to the Word ensured that the rules and structure of the house were according to the righteous standard of God. I, being a fearful individual throughout most of my life, saw the immediate value in appeasing my peers, and so I began to rebel at an early age. I am thankful that God has given me a family who is so dedicated to following Him and seeking after righteousness, for in spite of my rebellion, they always would pray for me and hope in the Lord Jesus Christ to save me from the deception from Satan that I was pursuing.
Years in school of striving for acceptance and social stature led me to sneaking out of the house at night, smoking cigarettes, smoking marijuana, running away, entering myself into foster care, disowning my family, abusing prescription meds like Ritalin, dabbling in witchcraft and Satanism, drinking, embracing porn and lust at an early age, losing my virginity mid teens, having no respect for people, using people, habitually stealing from my parents when I was younger and then my foster parents after, being empty and morose, attempting suicide twice at 17, spending about half a year in the psych ward, getting into the rave scene, doing more drugs(in my life I have done pretty much every drug out there, including new designer ones, aside from bath salts and heroin, and have had a few overdoses), and seeking after this idea of false love based on false unity that was beginning in the electronic music culture, with assistance from pagan spirituality, way back in the 90s there. All throughout my life there would be times of conviction, showing me that what I was seeking was absolutely wrong, but I kept on trying my hardest to deny God. God is love, and has His arms open, even to those who so vehemently reject Him as I was.
During this time I fell off a roof and broke my back on a railing. My body was made immobile with shock, and was angled over the railing toward the pavement many feet below, but an invisible force tilted my body to flop onto the deck. If I had gone over the railing, the story would have been much worse. I did fracture a vertebrae, but healed after a good while in the hospital and then in a rigid back brace after. I give thanks to God for protecting me from what would have been a much more severe story, if I had continued over the railing. After graduating I went back to the town of my family to try to work things out with them. They accepted me back into their home, as I was in a time of duress.
February 2001, I was driving to the town where I had left to come back home, to visit some friends, and I was speeding. I hit black ice, and collided with a tree drivers side door first, airborne 20 feet from where I had left the road, and bent the frame. The inspector told my parents that I had been doing between 140-150km/h when I hit the tree. They found me curled upright in the fetal position, in the centre of the vehicle between the two seats, with blood soaking my shirt from a wound on my chin. I had chipped my front teeth, so I imagine I hit my head on the steering wheel. I sustained what was diagnosed as a severe traumatic concussive brain injury, that resulted in haemorrhaging in the rear of my frontal lobe, significant memory and peripheral vision impairment, as well as any psychological changes that go along with something like that. I always wore my seatbelt when I drove, as I didn’t feel comfortable without it. If it had been on when I hit that tree, the story would have been very different. I was in a coma for a day and a half, and in and out of consciousness for a couple of weeks after that. I then spent numerous months in the rehabilitation ward, and after being released, met with an occupational therapist for a couple of years. I thank God for the miracle of being granted the blessing of keeping my life, through this severe accident.
After the injury satan brought back into my contact tobacco, and then marijuana, and I began to remember what I had used to do. I began searching those things out, until there was confrontation with my family when they found my stash, and I left the home as I did when I was younger. I went back to the town where I had run away to before, and got into meth about 4-5 months after the injury. Eventually I was able to return to the hometown, and my mom found me a suite of my own, where I ended up getting into crack cocaine because of people who wanted to use my place. In 2004, by the grace of God, and support of prayer from the church, I quit crack, marijuana, tobacco, and prescription meds, until 2009. Jesus Christ, King of kings and Lord of lords, came to this earth to free we who are all born in slavery to sin.
I had been working two jobs, and had been working an average of 10 hrs a day between the two. One day I laid down on my couch to have a nap in between them, when suddenly a big body jolt made me completely awake. I had been really tired, and what happened was similar to one of those muscle spasms that result in a limb twitching suddenly, when falling asleep. This was a full body spastic contortion, that raised my body up off the couch as I twisted, and I felt slightly airborne for only a very small moment. I was wide awake, and decided to not take the nap, and instead go and do my other job, where I could set my own schedule, as long as it got done every day. It wasn’t 20 minutes later that I got a call from a friend down the street, making sure I wasn’t home. When I got there 10 minutes later there were flames shooting 20 feet in the air from my bedroom window. The fire had started next door and jumped the wind channel between the two houses, to torch the suite I was living in. I thank God for keeping me from having that nap, which would have resulted in me being caught in a bad fire.
I lost pretty much all of my worldly possessions, and the comfortable home I had, but I had been fraternizing with worldly people, and was beginning to be enticed by an idea of love that is false. This false view of “love” is based on the happy, feel good, acceptance of relative truth. The goal is a unity that I had been witnessing in the electronic music culture, and is now spreading across the world. I thought of this house fire as a ‘sign from the universe’ to leave it all behind. I had begun a long distance polyamorous relationship with a woman in a city a few hours away, who I had met at an electronic music festival the summer before. During this relationship the values I had been raised with kept coming to the surface, and eventually it was ended, thankfully without contracting an STD. I give thanks to God for the conviction that He placed on my heart during this time, and for preserving me from lasting consequences.
Eventually I left this town and moved to that other city, after the relationship ended. In that city I did more drugs, lived with more self glorification, and encouraged a denial of God in others. During that time I fell in love, and tried to maintain the values I had been raised in, without relying on God for them, and honouring Him in my life. I became so caught up in making this self-reliant love work, that I stood by and supported her as she chose to abort my child, despite that being the hardest and most sickening decision I have ever made. I began to call out to God in desperation. God opened my eyes to see that He was absent of the love I shared with her, and that is why there was no hope in it. He brought me to see the lack of hope, love, and truth in my sinful life, and led me to walk away from it. He led me to return to the family and church that I left, and continue the work He was doing with me and all of us.
Here I have been experiencing a renewal of my heart, and mind, and of the once battered relationships with my family and church. He has been healing my heart of all the shame and remorse I have carried and tried to hide from, by seeking temporary sedation from material things. I have been experiencing God give me complete freedom from addictions I had resigned myself to having forever. I have been experiencing Him give me a love for Him that I have never known, and a desire for righteousness and truth that I hadn’t wanted to accept we all need. I have experienced Him take away my desire for the world, and the antichrist message of false love, through unity in denial of truth, that I had pursued and even helped propagate. I have been experiencing God show me that my only hope is in Him, and that the hope is founded and true. God has been transforming me into His servant, and I welcome more of His presence in my life, making me fully reliant on Him, purifying me and using me for His will and good pleasure. I have been called by God, to return to His arms, where I will abide, and thankfully receive the grace imparted to I who is undeserving.”
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